i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
