we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
this will be a night to untag.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
is that a dick in a sweater?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
