My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize