We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Sacagawea was the original milf.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
