Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
