The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize