finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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