if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
