I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
