Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize