I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
