this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
