just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
