idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Sorry about my life...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
