Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
