Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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