i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
he had hair everywhere except his balls
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Randomize
