Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
