I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
