i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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