Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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