thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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