loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I could fuck to npr.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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