I just saw a hot homeless man
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
