let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
