No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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