No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I did not marry a roomba.
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