This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
