Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
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