This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
