yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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