i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
