I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
