He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize