Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize