I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
