I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize