People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Small penises have feelings too.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Randomize
