She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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