yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
