He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
