Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
