You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
