Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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