Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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