I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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