are you still at the devil's house?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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