gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
