Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
