She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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