he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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