At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
My vagina is officially offended.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
