go do what you do best...puke behind churches
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
